


Millie's Mysteries

by gundamoocow



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Blue's Clues AU, Crack, Drabble, Gen, Implied Kylux
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:48:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28314795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gundamoocow/pseuds/gundamoocow
Summary: General Hux has a very secret hobby.
Comments: 13
Kudos: 18





	Millie's Mysteries

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this little drabble and posted it on tumblr some years ago. I'm putting it here for posterity.

“Millie!” Hux cries out in frustration as he sweeps an arm out to try to catch her. It's too late; she's halfway across the room, sitting down and eyeing him wearily.

Hux sighs. She'll be back by the time he needs her in the scene. He hopes.

For now, he drapes the red sheet over his black standard-issue armchair (the closest approximation to a big, soft armchair he can reasonably find). He frowns at the grey wall behind it. He'll have to figure out how to edit it later; this isn't something he can task his motivational holo editing team with. Still, he has his green striped shirt and tan slacks and, importantly, a brown wig. He hasn't decided if he should go with his natural look or not. After all, this is Millie's Mysteries, not Blue’s Clues, but if he changes his hair, he should really do his own take on the rest of the outfit, but right now, he doesn't have any ideas.

He sits down in the chair and picks up his Handy Dandy Datapad. A quick check of the surroundings confirms that all of the props are ready. Now he just needs Millie.

“Millie!” he pleads with his cat.

Millie ignores him, choosing to lift up a paw to lick instead. With a sigh, Hux resorts to a bribe. He produces a treat from his pocket, and Millie immediately takes interest and trots over to him.

“Good girl,” he says, stroking her back after she jumps into his lap. “Now, let's begin.” He clears his throat. “Begin recording,” he commands to the camera.

Thankfully, Millie is finally cooperating. “Meow.” She eyes Hux hopefully, no doubt looking for more treats.

“What's wrong, Millie?” Hux asks.

“Meow.”

“Oh my, someone stole your water bowl?*

“Meow.”

“Well, we had best find out what happened to it.” He reaches down beside the armchair and fishes out a beat up old Rebellion helmet with a carefully painted paw print on it. “Oh, no,” he exclaims. “What's this?”

Hux makes a show of examining it in front of Millie.

“Meow.”

“Was it the loathsome Resistance that stole your water bowl? They truly have no sense of decency.”

He fishes out the Handy Dandy Datapad from between his thigh and the seat and sketches the helmet.

Mail time is up next. The backing music is already prepared, but he has to wheel out the cardboard cutout mailbox himself. He picks up Millie so he can stand without tipping her off his lap, then carefully puts her down on the chair. Thankfully, she stays put while he drags the mailbox into the camera's view.

He clears his throat again and pushes the “play” button, confident that he'll get the song and dance routine right the first time.

The music starts.

“Here's the mail, it never fails. It makes me want to wag my tail. When it comes I want to wail, maaaaaai--”

His bedroom door bursts open and Kylo Ren swoops in, lightsaber ignited and ready to swing. “I knew you were hiding something, General! Tell me, who else are you fu--”

Hux is too mortified to even move.

Ren quickly takes his helmet off and withdraws the saber, a look of confusion plastered across his face. “Hux, what are you _doing_?”

**Author's Note:**

> You can follow me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/asstromechdroid) and [tumblr](https://agent-nemesis.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
